New and Improved: Pictures

As you may notice from now on, I endeavor to slowly augment my blog.  I do say "slowly" for slow is the only possible rate of improvement for one so overwhelmed by the internet as I. Not overwhelmed as in I don't understand how it works.  Rather, overwhelmed in the sense that there is too much information.  Too much advice, too much news, too much to keep up with.  

I would like to crawl in a cave... 

...and share my stories with my fellow cavemen away from all technology. 

Even better, I would like for Facebook, Twitter, and Other-scary-websites to simultaneously and inexplicably combust in a strange and unusual cyber fire.

But perhaps I have offended some of you who enjoy social networking.  I apologize.  You needn't heed the ranting of a madwoman.  

I seem to remember putting something about pictures in the title of this post.  You may be wondering about that.  Well, let me return to the correct topic.  I truly desire my blog to be more simulating for your eyes and brain.  Now to reveal the newest addition to my blog:

PICTURES

Wait, how did you know that already?  Well, it doesn't matter.  To find pictures for this exciting first day of visual beautification, I searched google with the keyword--interestingly enough--"pictures."  Most of the results were photographs of animals who have no idea how to spell or use correct grammar, such as this tiny fellow:

 

Or this kitten here:

I suppose it is excusable since they are animalz...animals.

But the picture that truly intrigued me was this one here:

Why does this woman have such a long dress?  Will these stairs support her?  Is she about to slide down the stair rail?

Most of my writing ideas start in my head.  But a picture like this really does inspire me.  I have a writer's exercise book called A Picture is Worth 1,000 Words, but I've only used it a few times.  

How about you, dear person who has read this far?  Has a picture ever inspired you to write something?  Do you actually begin story-hunting by looking at photos?

Short Post

I like writing "short" posts ("short" is a relative word), but right now I have an ULTRA short post. I returned to the blogging world a few days ago, but it's taken some time to raise the stamina to hit the "New Post" button.  This is a post simply to say that I will be posting an actual post as soon as I can stop overusing the word "post."    

Deplorable News

My dear followers, I want to assure you that the reason for my silence is not my death.  I am obligated to take a two-week cessation of blogging.  I may be able to participate in some internet activity, but as for my own blog, I will be unable to post again until my natal day, about a fortnight from hence.

When I return, I hope to post more consistently and more purposefully.  This dear lady has been so kind as to give me good advice for blogging, and during my absence I hope to arrive upon a decided "message" for my blog.  Indeed, it is about writing, but we shall see if it develops a stronger voice.  Perhaps it shall.

Until we meet again, I bid you adieu.  

  

Another Giveaway

Even though it creates more competition to tell y'all about this giveaway, I love you so much that I'm doing it anyway!  Take a peek!

Yankee Paparazzi

What would you do with your 15 minutes?

 Being a "person of interest" is not as cool as it sounds.....They finally caught up with me................................. .

Paparazzi: Mr. Yankee, Mr. Yankee……….click, click, click

Why did you leave the North?

Me: "Well, I never did leave the North mentally, it stays with me to the dismay of some of my southern friends.....But I love it here. I came down in the early 90's and stayed - Damn Yankee !-Can you please step off of my lawn" ...(eyeing the water hose) 

Paparazzi: Mr. Yankee, Mr. Yankee ………..Click

Tell me about the grits, the grits!!

Me: "I did not eat grits for the first few years I was down South. It was something I told myself I wasn't going to do. Me eat grits? Ewe! I would stick to my regional fare of cream of wheat. I eventually gave in, I eat them, but have been accused of southern blasphemy because I put Sweet N' Low on them..go figure? - No death threats tho!" 

Paparazzi: Mr. Yankee, Mr. Yankee..click, click..click..click

Tell us about your “Worm Grunting Experience” ??

Me: "You have not lived until you have experienced the worm gruntin' festival held annually in Sopchoppy Florida. When I first heard about this festival I had mental images of locals on stage with a microphone grunting like a worm, (does a worm grunt?) not unlike the pig calling contests I have seen on the news. Far from it! My wife had to tell me it's worm gruntin' "honey", NOT worm grunting! I did Google search "Worm Grunting" 84 times on the computer to get a better understanding, although my wife said she did the searches, on my computer, in my room, using my password and  while she was at work"

Paparazzi: Mr. Yankee, Mr. Yankee....tell us about your very first pick-up truck..

Me: "Well, I went ahead and purchased a 1977 Ford F100 pickup truck. It does qualify as an antique. This will be the first time in my life I have owned one. Every other vehicle down here is a truck of some sort, so now I feel like I truly belong. Driving a pick up truck with my northern flair for the dramatics - is not a good mix down here…. It's a different driving culture in the south.Up north we yell, swear and get all red faced. Here it's simple, it's what is not said that is important. oh, and I put my umbrella in the gun rack! I did run over 5 squirrels  one day or was it 6?, the truck did smell of dead animals." 

Paparazzi. Mr. Yankee, Mr.Yankee, Mr. Yankee..click..

What do you think of Casey Anthony?

Me: "I don’t really know, is she the sister of Mark? I don't remember hearing anything about Casey. I can tell you that I had a small problem with Marks relationship with Cleopatra. While I understand the distribution of nations among Cleopatra's children was hardly a conciliatory gesture, it did not pose an immediate threat to Octavian's political position.  Far more dangerous was the acknowledgment of Caesarion as legitimate and heir to Caesar's name." 

Paparazzi:(Click here to hear paparazzi reaction to last answer) 

Paparazzi: Mr. Yankee, Mr. Yankee..click, click..click..click


What can you say about Roosters? 


Me: "Corfu Rooster
Serving size depends on the bird
1 rooster, cut into pieces
7 garlic cloves, smashed
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1 teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon black pepper
3 tablespoon olive oil or lard
1 tablespoon tomato paste (or use some tomatoes)
2 tablespoons red-wine vinegar (or cider vinegar)
2 medium onions, halved and thinly sliced
3 ½ cups water
½ cup dry white wine (or vermouth or other booze)
1 teaspoon sugar

1 Role of duct tape"

I want it to be known that I have not hidden from the paparazzi, I don't have a team of handlers that look out for my every move. A photo of me (if I was in hiding ) would net approximately  $1.36 and that includes postage and handling. 


I had to tell all of my paparazzi pals that I have a busy schedule and must catch my ride that is waiting for me...

Where am I going? Got to keep you guessing, I have a brand to exploit !

A little tune to leave you with.....